Cause and Effect.

One of the thing that i love is reactions. Half the things i do is to generate a reaction. The other half, eh, not important. At least to this subject. If i want to do something i'll do it. I started to think about this again after so long because of a conversation with Andrea. Sometimes, i know the reaction. I get to know people quick. The way they move, the way they act, their likes and dislikes all point to how they would react to something i do. How they feel about me and other stuff goes into it as well. If i want to do something that would be sorta flirtatious or whatever and the girls feelings aren't the same as what mine might be then i don't do it. Which had stopped me from doing lots of things in the past. What they are stay with me.
Cause and effect. I cause something and weigh in on someones reactions. I am addicted to it. I really am.
When i saw a beautiful black woman sit next to me in math class in college, when i saw that she had feelings for me and the feelings that were building in my heart for her, i knew for a fact that i had to do something. I didn't know how she would react to it but i knew that i had to do something. So, in a slow elevator, alone, going down from the third floor of a building, i made my move. We flirted, played and then i kissed her. She returned the kiss and we made out all the way down.
Wondering how people would react to something i do started things between Tammy and I after a conversation we had about her wondering how i was in bed. I started things and then we were naked. Same thing when Heather (from way back then) and i got close and i put my hands down her pants, just to see her reaction. Same thing when i scratched at Tonya's back after i found out that that was one of her spots. Same thing with Jenn when i gave her Reunion.
If i left a message on your wall, or said something that was prolly alil off, yeah, i said it because i am curious and because i am addicted to reactions. I may not know exactly what you would do or how you would react but i will still do it.
I didn't know that Tammy would let me take off her pants and be all into the whole thing. I didn't know that Heather was going to run with it and have wild crazy sex with me from then on. I knew that Tonya would end up naked on that night, and i knew that Jenn would open up her heart to me more than she did before i gave her the story.
So if any of you ever thought that i wanted to do something with you or to you and i haven't, then i don't want to. Or the risks are too great. Which has prolly happened twice in the passed four years.